This is a communication system developed by Marshall Rosenburg that focuses on removing blaming, shaming and name calling from our language making us more impeccable with our word.

Rather than naming the other person’s behavior, the focus is on speaking honestly about your own needs and preferences and asking the other person to collaborate with you in achieving these.

His formula goes beyond simply making I statements to saying, “When you do (observable behavior) I feel (active emotion) because I have this (need or preference).” Mastering this language structure can make it possible to speak honestly about topics that would have started a fight put in the normal fashion.

I am fascinated with the power of speaking honestly about our needs and preferences in a way that does not coerce or judge others. I’ve also benefited from other wonderful researchers in this field including Sharon Elliston and Deborah Tannen.

Skillful communication allows greater intimacy in relationships, so I use this material a lot in my work with couples and groups. These skills are also invaluable in establishing a deeply compassionate relationship with yourself.

To learn more about how developing NVC skills can improve your life,contact me today!