Face it, in any longer term relationship, conflicts will arise. How you handle these will determine whether the relationship endures or goes down in flames. This is true in romance, in the family and in business. Become skillful
at fighting fair and avoid inadvertently killing off the good feelings at the base of any successful relationship.
The research says that relationships need 5 times as much good stuff as bad stuff for people to want to stay in them. This means that the fastest way to improve a relationship is to decrease the bad. You can’t avoid or ignore conflict – this will kill off the relationship also, so you have to get good at facing and resolving conflict in a way that is as painless as possible.
The most damaging attitude in conflict is disrespect – showing up in such behaviors as not listening, not validating, talking over, yelling etc. The essential message to convey to your partner to keep conflicts less damaging is that you respect their viewpoint. Simple but it may not be easy in the heat of the moment!
Want to build this skill and learn more? Come to my presentation this Tues 4/17 from 6:30 – 8:30 at 600 Siskiyou Blvd in Ashland!